Oh yes.....I am sure. I remember well the day she asked for it.
"You mean a copy of your birth certificate, don't you?" (I have in the safe under the bed, under lock and key, each girl's birth certificate, with several copies of each. I learned long ago to have those, to prove their age for sporting events and such).
"No, Mom, I need the original, for a passport."
WHAT? First she leaves for kindergarten, then for college, then to Huntington Beach, and now she wants to leave the country???
There was something really hard about handing over her original birth certificate. The proof that I gave birth to her, that she is mine....the one that her tiny inky footprints were pressed upon. It seemed to me like a document that had the power to keep her where she belonged....with me.
That's how I remember that I had already given it to her. I distinctly remember lying on the carpet by the bed, looking at it one last time thinking, "I guess she is really gone...."
So now that she is here, asking me for it again, I begin to wonder....."Maybe you didn't give it to her after all....maybe she forgot it on the counter, and you conveniently didn't remind her....and it got left at home, where you think it belongs....where you think she belongs.
So I go and look. No birth certificate. I guess I really did give it to her.
It wasn't there. But she is...and I'm thinking of keeping her prisoner. Letting go has never been my forte. I'm kind of one of those over-attached moms.
Allison was the first....and that was hard. Never again would we have all four daughters living full-time in our home. I don't think Allison felt ready to leave, but she was brave and blazed the trail. Suddenly, Sammy was leaving, and Charley right on her heels.....leaving me wondering, "Why did I have them so close together?" and "Why didn't I have more kids?" On our way to take Emily to BYU, we stayed a night in a motel in Elko, Nevada. I slept with her all night, hugging her tightly and we both cried.....well, mostly me. I'll never forget it. There goes my last girl....
Time flies by, kids grow up, and one day they want to leave and take their birth certificate with them. Well, I'm not giving them up without a fight!
I think I might have 2 or 3.....and I might have lost the key to the safe.
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| Samantha, Allison, Charley, Emily |
