please leave a message after the beep

It all started with Mason, my now 9-year-old nephew on Frank's side. He called right before Christmas in 2007 and left a message on our answering machine. He was singing "We Wish You a Merry Christmas".....twice through. My favorite part was "good tidings we bring, to you and your KIDS (instead of "kin")and his closing, which was Love, Love you Emma, Love.... Mason. It was so cute, that I had to save the message...and thus began the practice of saving phone messages. Here are messages 2-10:

Nancy (my old college roommate): "Called to say 'hi', I just lost a dear friend and it made me think about how much I love my friends, and I just wanted to tell you I love you..." She was in her car, driving to Utah for the funeral. Her voice was full of emotion. She's been such a devoted friend since we met at Little Apartments at BYU in 1980. I couldn't erase it.

Allison's old Seminary teacher, apologizing for the lateness of the hour, but he had just picked up the mail and received a letter of gratitude from Allison that had really touched him. He told me later that he "got a lot of miles out of that." It made me happy to know that she took the time to say thank you. Everyone loves to know that they are appreciated and made a difference, and he certainly did.

My Dad: "Hi Jo....this is Dad, I just came home from the Dr.'s office, and uh, saw that you called me. Just wanted to let you know that I'm OK." I love my Dad, and will want to be able to hear his voice at some future date when he is gone, telling me that he's OK. This is a treasure.

Allison (oldest daughter in Huntington Beach): "Hello? Hey mom, it's Allison...um, I was just calling you to tell you that I dropped my phone in the toilet, so if you're trying to get ahold of me..... Love you, bye!" Ohhh....I have gotten that same message about 3 times since she left home! It made me laugh.

Sammy (married daughter in Logan, Utah) "You guys are slackers....why aren't you answering your phone? Hello? Emily? I just talked to you....!" I'm picturing one of those moments where everyone is comfortably lounging on the couch or chair, all looking at each other, hoping someone else will jump up and get the phone so they don't have to move. Losers!

My Aunt Mary, 90 this year, my favorite aunt ever on my Dad's side: "Joanne, this is Aunt Mary, and I was, uh, calling to find out about your dad, call me....I'd like to hear from you....", and then she left the wrong phone number. It was the phone number for Macy's department store. I'll never forget when we took our young family to her home in Modesto for a visit in 1990. I was pregnant with Emily. She had planned this huge water gun/balloon fight in her back yard for the kids, and cooked the biggest lasagna I had ever seen. My sister Kristen and Frank's brother Monte joined us as well, and we took lots of videos that we love watching. On that video is an "interview" of my Grandpa Simon! He was a character.

Jenny (Wells)Miner, a former special student of my husband Frank's: "Hey Shields Family, this is Jenny Miner, just wanted to say hello and see how y'all are doin'....". Frank always says that Jenny is the happiest person he knows. She truly never stops smiling! She is a huge Vince Gill fan, who the Sacramento country radio station called regularly to put on the air. She graduated at least 10 years ago, is married with two little boys, and has called us regularly through the years. She is the epitome of happiness, and absolutely lights up a room.

Sam, Mike, and Claire (daughter, son-in-law, grandbaby): "We just wanted to say hi, and Claire wanted to laugh...."....and the cutest little laugh from Claire, when she first figured out how. Her laugh reminded me of a laughing doll that we gave Charley for Christmas when she was 1 and 1/2. I miss that doll, but now we have a real live doll of our own.

Emily (youngest daughter, 18), who was riding along to an appointment with Allison when she was here for work last month: "Let me guess....Sammy's breastfeeding, Charley's laying on the couch with her laptop, and mom is taking a nap. CALL ME....BYE". The funny thing was, she was EXACTLY right!

NOTE: Charley, I know you don't like to leave messages, but I'm waiting for one from you to complete my tape. There are only about 2 minutes left on this one! Then it will be retired to my bottom dresser drawer with all of my other treasures. I also am waiting to save a message from Frank, but his usually just say, "Jo? Jo? Is anyone home?" And then he hangs up. I'm usually RACING to the phone, but never make it in time because he is too quick. Either that, or his messages are "inappropriate."

Since my mom passed away almost 9 years ago, I have so often longed to hear her voice again. I wish I had thought of saving messages years ago. Fortunately, I do have her on video. But it's nice to be able to just push a button in my kitchen at any time to hear the voices of those I love. If my mom left a message for me today, I wonder what she'd say. I will be thinking about that all day today.

This is just my first tape. I hope to fill my drawer with messages from the ones I love.

Secret to Beauty

...always to be looking at someone who loves you.
~Julia Roberts

Killer Dress

Did you know that a dress can kill you? I didn't think so, but I found out last week that it just might be able to.

I was shopping in Target when I passed by a dress that caught my eye. I stopped in my tracks, took a couple of steps backward, and examined it. This dress had a lot of structure (ie., might make me look better than I really do). I took the dress off the rack and headed for the dressing room. I was alone. That part is important. I quickly got undressed and began pulling the dress over my head. You see, the dress had no zipper in the back, just a little one on the side. It was constructed of luxurious stiff brown fabric with crisp pink lining. No "give" whatsoever. As I was pulling it over my head, my subconscious casually reminded me, “You’re claustrophobic, and you might get stuck in this dress and suffocate.” I thought, “Yeah, but..... it might look really good on me! It’ll be OK, once I get past my shoulders.” So I continued. My next thought was a memory…. of Emily telling me that one time after church she was home alone, and was taking her dress off over her head because her zipper was stuck, and that she got stuck in it, and literally almost suffocated. I consoled myself by saying to myself, “What are the chances of that happening to two people in the same family?” So, I continued.

With not too much effort, I was able to shimmy the dress all the way down. Whew! There. Good. It was a little tight, but not too bad. This was looking like a possible keeper! I slipped my hands in the side-seam pockets, and was a little confused that my hands went to the back of my body, instead of resting on my hip bones like you’d expect. Oh. Weird. I guess some people just don’t know how to sew! Hmmph! I considered myself in the mirror, and noticed that it wasn't all that comfortable feeling. I suddenly realized that the covered buttons down the front were really supposed to decorate the back of the dress! Oh. So I had the dress on backwards. Great. Then….. horror of all horrors, I suddenly realized that somehow, SOMEHOW, I had forgotten to take off my blouse before trying on the dress, It was all bunched up under the too tight, backwards dress with no zipper. That is when panic set in. I was scared to take off the dress. What if it got stuck when it was halfway off? What if I suffocated and died in the dressing room of Target?

I calmly considered my options. ONE: I could ask the dressing room lady for help, but that would mean that I would have to expose myself....underwear, fat, etc. Not good. TWO: I could gather my things, walk out with the backwards dress on and scurry to the checkout counter and say, “I’d like to purchase this dress I'm wearing backwards and can't get off. Here, I’ll just lean over and bend down a bit so you can scan it.”….. then smile and casually leave the store with a scream of horror stifled in my throat. Possibly. THREE: Preserve my dignity and try to get the darn dress off. I chose number 3. I mustered my courage, took a deep breath, and reassured myself by saying that logic dictates that if I got the dress on, it had to come off. What goes up, must come down, or something like that.

I crossed my arms in front of me, grabbed both edges of the hem, and lifted the dress over my head. Except that it never made it over my head, but got stuck on my shoulders. My arms were straight up in the air, folds of dark brown fabric pressed against my nose and mouth, and darkness engulfing me. I was running out of air. I considered my options. ONE: Yell, “Help!”, and then instruct the dressing room lady to crawl under the dressing room door because I could no longer reach the latch. Adding that humiliation to the underwear and fat sighting would be just too much to bear. TWO: Lay down so I could reach my purse, fumble for mycell phone, and call Emily at school and say, “Emily, get down to the Target dressing room right now and help me or I might suffocate and die!!!” She’d probably ask a million questions, and by that time I’d already be dead. Not an option. THREE: Feel around for the miniature scissors on my key chain and start snipping as fast as I could. Dumb idea. That’s ruining a perfectly good $39.99 dress! FOUR: (My number of options is increasing? I'm confused….) Muster all of my bionic woman strength, say a prayer, and get the dress OFF. I chose Number 4. That’s what I did.

After what seemed (and probably looked) like a brawl with the dress, it fell to the floor. Actually, I thrust it to the floor of the dressing room. Then I looked in the mirror….hair tousled, face red, panting….I looked myself right in the eye, pointed a finger and said, “You! You are SO STUPID! You could have been killed! All for a stupid dress!!!!!” Then I mumbled, “I hate this dress…..”, and I nearly growled at it.

I hurriedly got dressed, exited the dressing room, and headed back to the rack, still catching my breath. As I hung the dress on the rack, I noted that there was another one, one size bigger. Hmmmmm......I thought, “Well….it iiiissss a cute dress!” I grabbed it and headed for the check-out counter. Unbelieveable. I bought it. But! I didn’t try it on until I got home and had supervision. :)

I ultimately decided that it was a cute dress, but not cute on me, and that I really did need to lose 30 pounds. A few days later, I found a dress in almost the same style, with comfortable, forgiving fabric, and a zipper in the back. I love it! And best of all, it isn't life threatening!

So beware, ladies! Learn from my experience. A dress really could kill you!

Time to Begin

I have been wanting to start my own blog, but waiting for a good reason to begin one. I think this week I found it.

Yesterday I received an email from the mother of my best childhood friend....Randelle. Her mom reminded me that tomorrow would be Randi's 48th birthday. Randi passed away in April of cancer. Tomorrow, after running in the Race for the Cure, Randi's family and friends will be visiting her gravesite to share their sorrows and memories, and to celebrate Randi .... her life and all she meant to them. Her three daughters, near the ages of my own, her devoted husband Mike, and the dear friends she made along the way will never again in this life be able to share special moments with her. We each hold our memories of her close and look forward to a grand reunion someday.

I want to begin writing down my thoughts, my memories, my hopes, and my dreams, while I am still here to do it. I'll write about the things that matter to me most, which are many and varied, but all of which can be distilled down to my love for my family and friends. This blog is really for you. I hope it will be a monument to my gratitude for all of the little things in my life that make me smile and bring me great joy.....so that someday when I'm gone, there will be a record of how happy my husband and daughters have made me, and how fortunate I am to have been blessed with good friends. Starting today I will attempt to make a memorial to what I consider to be my wonderful life.....the trip I choose to take.